I am going to do my best here. My physical health right this minute feels a bit like a metaphor to what is also my current emotional condition. First, a little information on my physical health. For several months, but more noticeably since the end of March, I have been sick. I saw my primary … Continue reading Please Send Help. I am LOST.
Author: becksnelson
Life Is Messy
It happens to everyone, I am quite sure. The inability to think not just linearly but with any sort of focus. I have gone through these phases probably most noticeable to others when I am depressed or physically off - maybe, or generally, a combination of both. The perfect people out there may only notice … Continue reading Life Is Messy
Nobody
My maternal grandmother was a force to be reckoned with. She scared me when I was a child, and she lives in my head now. Don't get me wrong, I have pleasant memories of my grandmother. This post is not about pleasant memories though. It is about torment. I wanted to take up space, to … Continue reading Nobody
Darkness
Disclaimer (Not that I need one): I promised to write. It isn’t the story I wanted to share. I wanted to write about my grandma’s last words to me. Or maybe I could have told you about a unique skill I developed in 6th grade. Or even a progress report on my intention for 2022. … Continue reading Darkness
Geriatric Wheelchair Races and Talking About Sex Have Something In Common
I went to a “geriatrics” Sadie Hawkins New Years event in college and donned my 1970’s polyester peach pantsuit that a floormate had brought back to the dorm in a large black trash bag after helping an older woman clean out her closet. With black bowling style shoes, makeup overdone, and hair dusted with baby … Continue reading Geriatric Wheelchair Races and Talking About Sex Have Something In Common
Gracefully Strong, Fearlessly Compassionate
It is just another weekday morning in my dimly lit, cool home, where I comfortably eat my overnight oats and French eggs at the oak table passed down from my paternal grandparents. The table reminds me of my grandparents quite often. Ironically, I have been asking myself a lot of questions lately about my present … Continue reading Gracefully Strong, Fearlessly Compassionate
Beautifully Broken
This post was written by a fellow, beautifully broken friend, Katie Walker. She is an example of grace in fire. I am grateful for her permission to publish this. I made minimal edits but wanted to keep the integrity of her words.If you want to see what she is up to, check out her personal … Continue reading Beautifully Broken
Ride the Wind, Friends
Photo Credit: Sara DelPrete, taken by the North Branch of the Tunkhannock Creek (Pennsylvania) My porch is a bit of a sanctuary, albeit a cluttered one. It is one of the few places I can go where no one else is around. Two 9-year-old, gray gravity chairs rest upon the newly replaced wooden wraparound porch, … Continue reading Ride the Wind, Friends
Small Victories
Photo by Eva Elijas on Pexels.com Life began burying me in March, and digging out seems to be a terrifyingly impossible challenge. Triggers, similar to those in 2015, have left me in a parallel universe where what is happening now is blended with things that either have not happened or occurred years ago. Grief, anxiety, … Continue reading Small Victories
Shed The Expectations
Hopping on the Encanto Bandwagon My therapist in Utah contacted me one day to ask me if I had seen the movie Encanto. He told me he had watched it with his daughter and thought of me. According to him, one of the characters was a near-perfect portrayal of me. (He did not tell me … Continue reading Shed The Expectations