I understand the importance of trigger warnings for people. I really do. We owe it to survivors of traumatic situations to put a trigger warning on things, but as someone who has experienced some traumatic situations, I need the debate to be less about an attempt to sensor material and more about sensitivity to those … Continue reading I Needed The “Luckiest Girl Alive”
Author: becksnelson
Embrace the Suck…Er…Shame (Part)
Have you ever pretended to be someone you aren’t? I don’t mean “fake it until you make it.” I mean acting a part but being an imposter. I recently read about a man who may have murdered a twenty-year-old man, but investigators couldn’t prove it. Instead, they charged the man for every other crime they … Continue reading Embrace the Suck…Er…Shame (Part)
Power Rangers and Parts
Photo by Raphaël Cubertafon on Unsplash Let’s talk for a moment about the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. At the expense of my son’s future dignity, I will reveal that he watched several episodes and a movie recently, and that provided me with the small amount of information I have here. The Power Rangers were not … Continue reading Power Rangers and Parts
Self-Compassion Is Difficult
Self-compassion is difficult. I remember the negative things I have said or done, and those things become who I am. Each and every poor decision, unkind word spoken—or not, embarrassing moment, or thought provides me with proof that I am a loathsome human. Except, am I? The little three-year-old Becks I saw in the mirror … Continue reading Self-Compassion Is Difficult
The Heavy Bag
Photo by Milo Bunnik on Unsplash Last night I couldn’t sleep. For some reason, I kept thinking about a punching bag—one I had beaten for close to 10 minutes straight without a break. When I couldn’t possibly throw another punch, I held the heavy bag. When I say I held it, I mean I flat-out … Continue reading The Heavy Bag
The Lion and the Elephant
Have you ever read The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho? It is an incredibly popular book and highly recommended, yet when I looked at my Goodreads account, I noticed it had only 3.9 stars. Why? Mostly because it was a self-help fiction book with patriarchal undertones, according to the reviews. If you look past that, I … Continue reading The Lion and the Elephant
Reset and Recommit
Have you ever set a boundary you were proud of only to be guilted about your decision? That happened to me, and shame wrapped its tendrils around my limbic system (for those who like to nerd out like me: the part of the brain that controls behavioral and emotional responses; hippocampus and amygdala, with a … Continue reading Reset and Recommit
Please Send Help. I am LOST.
I am going to do my best here. My physical health right this minute feels a bit like a metaphor to what is also my current emotional condition. First, a little information on my physical health. For several months, but more noticeably since the end of March, I have been sick. I saw my primary … Continue reading Please Send Help. I am LOST.
Life Is Messy
It happens to everyone, I am quite sure. The inability to think not just linearly but with any sort of focus. I have gone through these phases probably most noticeable to others when I am depressed or physically off - maybe, or generally, a combination of both. The perfect people out there may only notice … Continue reading Life Is Messy
Nobody
My maternal grandmother was a force to be reckoned with. She scared me when I was a child, and she lives in my head now. Don't get me wrong, I have pleasant memories of my grandmother. This post is not about pleasant memories though. It is about torment. I wanted to take up space, to … Continue reading Nobody
Burn the Boat! 