Photo by Markus Winkler on Pexels.com I started the New Year by reading about and focusing on death. It's not because I am dying, preparing for someone else to die, or trying to deal with a past death, though I suppose all of those things are technically also true. Everyone close to me knows I … Continue reading Death in 2026?
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She Isn’t Me
All of my blog posts are vulnerable, but this one feels even moreso. You see, I have been writing, but I had no intention of continuing my blog. I was really hurting, and I didn't want anyone to see that any more than was necessary (because that feels weak), and I didn't want anyone to … Continue reading She Isn’t Me
What Would Life Be Like?
"What would life be like if [that one person] didn't still hold all the space in your life?" Dr. C. asked me to think about that question and write about it. I originally told her I have no imagination, and I was pretty sure, as I said that, that there was no way I would … Continue reading What Would Life Be Like?
“Write About That”
Dr. C. ended our session by telling me to write about how I don't feel as though I deserve to feel upset about what happened because I "just need to take responsibility." So, I wrote about it for the next session. I wrote about it to better understand what I was experiencing and feeling. I … Continue reading “Write About That”
Dear Becks (Part 5)
This is probably the hardest letter to write, which makes sense why it's the last and almost didn't make the cut. It's not that I don't want to say a lot - or that I don't have A LOT ot say. It's that I don't know how to say it without sounding like I'm falling … Continue reading Dear Becks (Part 5)
Dear Becks (Part 3)
I've been sitting for a while now, trying to focus on writing this letter. I know you know what that is like. I remember you starting laundry, making dinner, and drinking two travel mugs of coffee every Friday night just to sit down and do your homework. There was something about how you couldn't relax … Continue reading Dear Becks (Part 3)
But I’m Proud of Myself
I woke up in a cold sweat. My heart wasn't pounding as it normally does when I have a nightmare. No, it was actually quite slow, and my breathing was shallow. This happens sometimes, usually when I am frozen in my dream. This wasn't directly a trauma dream that I was frozen in though. I … Continue reading But I’m Proud of Myself
The ReWrite (Part 2)
Back in the end of May, I wrote about what it was like to rewrite part of my trauma narrative. I had only written what I would consider the first half as it included my experience as an 8-year-old, 10-year-old, and 13-year-old. It was only a few days later that I worked on and completed … Continue reading The ReWrite (Part 2)
The Rewrite (Part 1)
Dr. C. asked if she could have my narrative. I searched through my bag, pulled out my portable keyboard case, unzipped it, and found the folded and worn blue legal pad pages. I carefully pulled them out and leaned forward, arm extended to pass them to her. This was the next step we had been … Continue reading The Rewrite (Part 1)
Challenge By Choice Part 2
When I returned from Utah in 2021, I wrote a blog post called Challenge By Choice. In it, I wrote about the choices we, as a group from Annie's House, were given. Each person was challenged to decide what was best for themself: stay on the ground and cheer for others, climb any number of … Continue reading Challenge By Choice Part 2
Burn the Boat! 