Common to all humanity, at least in my opinion, is the struggle to avoid pain. This includes avoiding the pain that can heal us as well. I dropped a 45lb plate on my big toe a few years ago. That toenail eventually fell off. As it started to grow back, I dropped a tractor tire … Continue reading Mindfulness: Allow It
Courage
Question
"Was it rape?" "Can you clarify?" "[person's name]...the first time..." “Let’s process.” After skimming back through Amelia Zachry’s book, Enough: A Memoir of Mistakes, Mania, and Motherhood, I asked my therapist the above question early one Friday evening. The following Tuesday, I sat in my therapist's office feeling lightheaded, weak, and uncomfortable in my skin. … Continue reading Question
Enough
I think it was October of 2022 when I ordered a book called Enough: A Memoir of Mistakes, Mania, and Motherhood by Amelia Zachry. I started reading the book almost immediately after receiving it and sent Amelia a message about her story's impact and that I was gleaning so much from it. The more I read, the … Continue reading Enough
Do The Dang Thing
There is a part of me that makes accusations, nasty ones. “You’re not good enough.” “You suck.” “You deserve everything that has happened.” “You are a f*ckup.” “If anyone knows how weak you are, you will be deserted.” “If people know you, they won’t like you.” And so much more. That part feeds shame and … Continue reading Do The Dang Thing
Embrace the Suck…Er…Shame (Part)
Have you ever pretended to be someone you aren’t? I don’t mean “fake it until you make it.” I mean acting a part but being an imposter. I recently read about a man who may have murdered a twenty-year-old man, but investigators couldn’t prove it. Instead, they charged the man for every other crime they … Continue reading Embrace the Suck…Er…Shame (Part)
The Lion and the Elephant
Have you ever read The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho? It is an incredibly popular book and highly recommended, yet when I looked at my Goodreads account, I noticed it had only 3.9 stars. Why? Mostly because it was a self-help fiction book with patriarchal undertones, according to the reviews. If you look past that, I … Continue reading The Lion and the Elephant
Life Is Messy
It happens to everyone, I am quite sure. The inability to think not just linearly but with any sort of focus. I have gone through these phases probably most noticeable to others when I am depressed or physically off - maybe, or generally, a combination of both. The perfect people out there may only notice … Continue reading Life Is Messy
2022 Intention Part One: Lists of Eight
In November 2021 I excitedly told my therapist it had been nearly one year since I self-harmed. Just a few months before, I was convinced I would not make it to the 365-day mark, but with only twenty days left, I knew I could tough it out if needed. There was an element of pride … Continue reading 2022 Intention Part One: Lists of Eight