Have you ever set a boundary you were proud of only to be guilted about your decision? That happened to me, and shame wrapped its tendrils around my limbic system (for those who like to nerd out like me: the part of the brain that controls behavioral and emotional responses; hippocampus and amygdala, with a … Continue reading Reset and Recommit
Author: becksnelson
Please Send Help. I am LOST.
I am going to do my best here. My physical health right this minute feels a bit like a metaphor to what is also my current emotional condition. First, a little information on my physical health. For several months, but more noticeably since the end of March, I have been sick. I saw my primary … Continue reading Please Send Help. I am LOST.
Life Is Messy
It happens to everyone, I am quite sure. The inability to think not just linearly but with any sort of focus. I have gone through these phases probably most noticeable to others when I am depressed or physically off - maybe, or generally, a combination of both. The perfect people out there may only notice … Continue reading Life Is Messy
Nobody
My maternal grandmother was a force to be reckoned with. She scared me when I was a child, and she lives in my head now. Don't get me wrong, I have pleasant memories of my grandmother. This post is not about pleasant memories though. It is about torment. I wanted to take up space, to … Continue reading Nobody
Darkness
Disclaimer (Not that I need one): I promised to write. It isn’t the story I wanted to share. I wanted to write about my grandma’s last words to me. Or maybe I could have told you about a unique skill I developed in 6th grade. Or even a progress report on my intention for 2022. … Continue reading Darkness
Geriatric Wheelchair Races and Talking About Sex Have Something In Common
I went to a “geriatrics” Sadie Hawkins New Years event in college and donned my 1970’s polyester peach pantsuit that a floormate had brought back to the dorm in a large black trash bag after helping an older woman clean out her closet. With black bowling style shoes, makeup overdone, and hair dusted with baby … Continue reading Geriatric Wheelchair Races and Talking About Sex Have Something In Common
Gracefully Strong, Fearlessly Compassionate
It is just another weekday morning in my dimly lit, cool home, where I comfortably eat my overnight oats and French eggs at the oak table passed down from my paternal grandparents. The table reminds me of my grandparents quite often. Ironically, I have been asking myself a lot of questions lately about my present … Continue reading Gracefully Strong, Fearlessly Compassionate
Beautifully Broken
This post was written by a fellow, beautifully broken friend, Katie Walker. She is an example of grace in fire. I am grateful for her permission to publish this. I made minimal edits but wanted to keep the integrity of her words.If you want to see what she is up to, check out her personal … Continue reading Beautifully Broken
Ride the Wind, Friends
Photo Credit: Sara DelPrete, taken by the North Branch of the Tunkhannock Creek (Pennsylvania) My porch is a bit of a sanctuary, albeit a cluttered one. It is one of the few places I can go where no one else is around. Two 9-year-old, gray gravity chairs rest upon the newly replaced wooden wraparound porch, … Continue reading Ride the Wind, Friends
Small Victories
Photo by Eva Elijas on Pexels.com Life began burying me in March, and digging out seems to be a terrifyingly impossible challenge. Triggers, similar to those in 2015, have left me in a parallel universe where what is happening now is blended with things that either have not happened or occurred years ago. Grief, anxiety, … Continue reading Small Victories
Burn the Boat! 